37 Chapter 2 Mindset Matters Copyright Goodheart-Willcox Co., Inc. You may feel that others have a single story of you, due to where you come from, what you look like, or another part of your identity. You might meet people at college who are surprised about the things you know, your experiences, interests, mannerisms, or anything else about you because it contradicts the single stories they have heard about you. Now think about the single stories you tell about yourself. At first glance, this might sound strange, because you know yourself well enough that you would think that your view of yourself is pretty nuanced. But single stories are those little phrases and beliefs, the refrain of the story that you might whisper to your- self as you see your reflection, or as you check your grades or your social media. You might not even hear them on a conscious level (I’m so bad at X. I hate Y. I guess I’m just Z.). Let’s dig deeper and examine beliefs that we all hold about ourselves, which are based on reinforcement over time and that paint us in a light that doesn’t fully encompass us as people or that may be just plain wrong. Think about the discussion of the looking-glass self in the previous part of this chapter. If your identity truly is based on how you believe others see you, then how does the idea of a single story play into it? It means that the single stories you believe others have of you becomes your single stories of yourself—as in, “Because I’m from a small town, people think I’m closed-minded, so I guess I’m not open to hearing new ideas.” It’s so much more complicated than that, but it also is not. It’s as simple as you believing these reductions of yourself, which are then reproduced in your actions and that reflect this belief. Thus, it’s very important to be aware of what underlies your beliefs and actions as they relate to yourself. Ultimately, everyone has single stories about other people and also about them- selves. What we can’t do is go back in time and reverse the beliefs we have settled into. What we can do is be critical of these beliefs, challenge them, and overturn them through conscious and intentional movements to facilitate a more open mind. We can also continue to reject single stories told by the media, our peers, or others in our lives. Resisting these simplifications of others and ourselves is a powerful step toward having a more complex worldview, which enriches our experiences. THINK ABOUT IT What’s a script/label that was put on you by others when you were a child? This could be a memorable statement that was often said to you or about you (for example, “She’s my athletic one” or “You’re always so negative”). Or perhaps this might be a story that was often told about you to others. Or maybe this was an expectation that was communicated to you through other means—verbal, nonverbal, environmental cues, etc. Who produced the script or label? Who perpetuated it? How do you think it impacted your beliefs about yourself or your decisions?