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Part Five Dimensions of Families
interdependence. This means each must learn to
give and take from the other person while still
maintaining his or her own individuality.
During this stage, each spouse must adjust
to life with another person, 14-9. Each one
has to learn to consider the other person’s
needs. Gradually, a couple works out
acceptable patterns for everyday activities.
Morning routines are settled, and household
responsibilities are divided. Often in this
stage, both spouses have careers. Further
adjustments may be needed as spouses
learn to support each other in their work as
well as in their marriage.
The length of this stage varies. Some
couples shorten this stage and immediately
enter the childbearing stage. Other couples may stay
in this fi rst stage and bypass the stages involving parenthood. Many
will simply lengthen this stage as they postpone parenthood.
Childbearing Stage
The second stage begins with expectant parenthood, when the
couple’s focus is on the coming birth. Pregnancy is considered to be a
time of transformation. The couple prepares for a new family member
and begins to realize that nothing will again ever be the same.
When the fi rst child is born, the focus of the couple suddenly
shifts. Primary attention is given to the needs of the infant. New
responsibilities, demands on time and energy, limitations on freedom,
and additional expenses occur. The new roles of father and mother are
added to the roles of husband and wife.
Parenthood can bring a couple closer together, or it can increase
conflict. If parents want the child and have realistic expectations, a child
can bring a sense of fulfi llment. If one or both did not want a child,
parenthood may be viewed as limiting and confi ning.
As a couple have additional children, the number of interpersonal
relationships within the family expands. Children’s roles also
change. Sons become brothers. Daughters become sisters. The family
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During the beginning stage, a couple adjust to
living together as husband and wife.