Chapter 1 Parenting: A Rewarding Choice 19
Parenting Myths and
Realities
As with other careers, some people may
think of parenting as the “perfect” career.
Because of this thinking, they may believe
and spread myths about parenting. A myth is
a half-true or untrue story or notion used to
explain certain traditions, practices, or beliefs.
Myths about parenting come from
several sources, such as society and families.
Society has had a long history of cultural
and traditional thinking. These thoughts
contain many truths as well as myths. Until
rather recently, experts in family life and
child development rarely studied parenting.
Because parent education was not available,
people relied on information passed down
to them through generations about how to
raise children. This information was based on
family culture and traditions. Although some
of this traditional thinking was correct, and
continues to be, other ideas are now known
to be incorrect. For example, such notions as
“You’ll spoil babies if you pick them up” are
now known to be false. The reality is that
babies need to be held and comforted in order
to build trust and feel secure, 1-5.
Second, society often promotes a romantic
complex—an ideal view having no basis
in fact—about parenthood. For example,
think about how the media represents
children and their families. Is it realistic or a
misrepresentation of reality?
Third, not all experts agree on every
aspect of parenting. This problem may
confuse some parents. Parenting is a highly
complex and individual process. Experts will
continue to do research and provide more
knowledge about parenting, but myths may
still exist until facts replace them.
Why is it important to address parenting
myths? Believing false ideas about the role
of parenthood may harm the parent-child
relationship. Having unrealistic or impossible
role expectations may lead to stress for both
parents and their children. Understanding
myths for what they are will help you know
what the parenting career is really like. Here
are some common parenting myths you may
have heard.
Myth #1:
All parenting skills are instinctive.
Some people say all parenting skills
are instinctive, or based on a natural skill or
capacity. They say people are born knowing
how to be parents; it just comes naturally.
Many mothers and fathers do seem naturally
well suited to being parents. This doesn’t
mean they instinctively know it all or have
nothing to learn. No one is born with all the
preparation needed to be an effective parent.
Parenting takes hard work and practice.
1-5 Holding and comforting babies is essential in
order for them to feel secure in their world.